Consider this a preview for a verbose rant on how much I hate Saint Paul's Skyway Patrons. My school is only four blocks away from my apartment, and those four blocks are the worst fucking part of my entire day. I'm constantly blocked by rotund administrative assistants - who just wouldn't be able to sleep at night if they couldn't block the entire fucking walking path to browse the gourmet chocolate kiosk inside of Macy's - amongst a myriad of other failures that do nothing but cause me extreme anxiety. I've got about 12 pages of college ruled hate ready to be thrown on the internet; I just need to get better acquainted with Adobe Illustrator. (Seriously. The drawings below took me two hours because Illustrator does NOT have a "paint bucket" tool; Illustrator is just that fucking future.) However, today I just had to update about the homunculus I saw during my lunch break.
I was browsing for a cheap Chinese take out place, when I saw a new side cart; it's specialty was ice cream. I started to walk towards it to get a better glance at its name, but I was almost trampled to death by a foul beast as it stormed to the ice cream cart to make sure it arrived at the diabetes water hole before the rest of the herd. It was short, dense, and I couldn't find it's feet with my eyes. This is a rough sketch of what I had seen.
After I realized it was a fat, middle aged secretary, I became filled with rage; I was ready to boast that I had successfully escaped a feral razorback onslaught. For a brief moment, I watched her shovel the vanilla scoops (Seriously? All that fucking effort and energy for a cup of vanilla?) down her throat. This was my reaction:
I hope you at least had time to taste it. Moo cow.
- ab
where's your hair? live trace that. Best of luck in your artistic future.
ReplyDeleteI don't like having hair, but I'm too stubbborn to shave it off. This is my one chance to have a shaved head; don't ruin it for me.
ReplyDelete-ab